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Monday, July 8, 2013

Just In Case You Wanted My Opinion; My movie review of White House Down

White House Down
Rated:  PG-13
Starring:  CHANNING TATUM and Jamie Foxx

The Premise:  While on a tour of the white house with his young daughter, a capitol policeman springs into action to save his child and protect the president from a group of heavily armed paramilitary invaders.

You knew this review was coming, right?  Despite my hesitation after negatively reviewing a string of Channing Tatum let-downs, I can't pass up the opportunity to see him via big screen.  Don't get me wrong.  I don't blame Channing for most of the recent disappointments.  It wasn't his fault that they completely misrepresented The Vow and I doubt it was his choice to get offed within the first 15 minutes of G.I Joe.  I do hold him somewhat responsible for the Magic Mike debacle, seeing as it was based on his life story.  I mean come on, even if a baby pig really did eat vomit at some point in your days as an exotic dancer, must it be included in your life story?  Your female fan base votes no. 

With all that in mind, the first time I saw the trailer for White House Down, I decided to stay level headed and not get sucked into those green eyes and bulging biceps, but before I knew what was happening, I felt my husband staring at me and realized my head was tilted all the way to the side with my jaw slightly dropped open and a glazed look in my eyes.  I guess my impartiality went by the wayside.

The premise of the movie is self-explanatory.  Tons of action and excitement that both men and women will enjoy, albeit for different reasons.  Jamie Foxx plays a great president and his comedic timing and natural rapport with Channing laces unexpected humor throughout the movie.  Realistically, Channing should have been killed during most of the shootouts, because I'm sorry, you just can't dodge that many bullets.  But if we're talking realistically, I would have rioted the theater had that happened.

We don't ask much from Channing Tatum movies.  We want to see him charming and funny, playing the hero, walking away from fire in slow motion and dive rolling through a spray of bullets.  We want to see him protecting a child, outwitting the enemy and fighting hand to hand, all while profusely sweating.  We want to see him driving fast, shooting automatic weapons, slowly climbing out of a swimming pool soaking wet and pulling on a bullet proof vest over a sweat-drenched tank top that's clinging to his chest.
 ...give me just a second here...

My Grade for White House Down:  A+
Because somebody finally gave us exactly what we want.

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