If you wanna feel better about your family, just read about ours...

Starring: a dad, a mom, a son & daughter-in-law, a daughter & son-in-law, a teen, a tween, a grandson, a granddaughter, 3 dogs, 2 rabbits, 2 dwarf frogs, an unfortunate number of tadpoles, and a whole lot of love.




Family Story Pic

Family Story Pic

Labels

Friday, February 24, 2012

Just in case you wanted my opinion: My Movie Review

Rarely do my husband and I go see movies in the theater, but between our Anniversary and Valentines Day, there seemed to be some good ones, so we took advantage of the celebration season and splurged on a few. When people started asking my opinion about the movies before they spent their money, I thought a blog entry might be in order.

(((WARNING))) This might contain what you might consider a "Spoiler" or two. I'll try not to give anything major away.

So let's begin. (In the order in which we saw them.)

Contraband
~ starring Mark Wahlberg~ Rated R
It's an action-thriller about a guy who left behind the world of crime, but finds himself sucked back, in a desperate attempt to save his family. It'll have you sitting on the edge of your seat in suspense and, if you're anything like me, rooting for Mark Wahlberg no matter what he's doing on the giant screen. If you're a fan of The Departed, you'll appreciate this gritty movie. It's real and you leave feeling like you actually saw a glimpse into the underworld of drugs and corruption. If you're appalled and offended by any and all use of the f-bomb, you won't be a fan. Here's my stance on the f-bomb in movies. When a movie is full of it simply to add to it's raunch, I can't stand it. (ie; The Change Up) No thank you. But when it fits into the story line (ie; The Departed) it doesn't jump out at me because it's expected there.
My Grade for Contraband: A+

Man On A Ledge
~starring Sam Worthington & Elizabeth Banks~ Rated PG-13
It's an action movie about an ex-con who creates an aversion on the ledge of a building while a diamond heist is being committed to prove his innocence, all while a Police Psychologist tries to talk him down. First of all, if you know who Sam Worthington or Elizabeth Banks is, you're several steps ahead of me. I would have preferred people more well known who I would have actually cared about. So to me, their characters weren't very likable. Also, if you're the type of person who needs the movie to be extremely accurate and realistic, this is not for you. But, if you go to a movie to be entertained, enjoy a few twists and turns in the plot and a sprinkling of humor, you'll find yourself enjoying this one.
My Grade for Man On A Ledge: B+

The Woman In Black
~starring Harry Potter~ (Admit it, you don't know him by any other name either.) Rated PG-13
They classified this as "Horror" but I'd label it more "Suspense." It's about a young lawyer who travels to a small village for business, but finds himself confronting a ghost who's targeting the village children. To me, this wasn't horror. I mean, it wasn't pleasant, but I wasn't screaming and hiding my eyes from bloody gory scenes, either. But when a movie is set back in the time of horses and buggies, using candles for lighting, featuring creepy old time children who blankly stare at things both seen and unseen while surrounded by their creepy old toys, you've got a recipe for suspense. And you might not think so now, but a dark quiet room with a sudden outburst of a toy monkey springing to life in a creepy dance has the potential to make you jump in your seat. (Um, not that I did.)
My Grade for The Woman In Black: A

Safe House
~starring Denzel Washington and Ryan Reynolds~ Rated R
They labeled this "Action/Crime/Mystery." I label this "Pointless & Predictable" and it pains me to say that, because I consider Denzel Washington and I to be tight. It's about a young CIA agent who's in charge of a fugitive in a, yep you guessed it, Safe House. But shortly into the movie, the Safe House is broken into and the running, chasing, fighting and killing begins. For the first half of the movie, I kept leaning over to my husband and whispering, "What's going on?" And he'd shrug. Not a good sign if he doesn't understand it either. And whereas, in almost all of his other movies, I'm rooting for Denzel to come out on top, in this one....(((SPOILER ALERT)))....I was happy to see him die. One less person confusing the plot, ya know? By the time we put together what was happening, he and I both could have told you how it was going to end. No different than any other movie ever made about corruption in high places. All hype, no delivery. *Yawn*
My Grade for Safe House: D-

The Vow
~starring Channing Tatum and Rachel McAdams~ Rated PG-13
If you haven't heard of this Chick-Flick, you've been living under a rock. But if you've accurately heard about this Chick-Flick, I'd be surprised. My understanding of this based-on-a-true-story movie, was that it was about a young married
who were in a car accident, which led to her memory loss of who he was and the journey of how he helped her fall back in love with him. The day before I saw the movie, they had the real-life couple on The Today Show and their story was so sweet and I was excited to see it. (And hello? Channing Tatum, anyone?) But the story actually centered around her manipulative parents who she'd been estranged from, but who used her accident as a means of rewriting history and regaining control of her life, while alienating her husband completely. Yes, they showed a few of his attempts at restoring the marriage, but it ultimately led to the.....(((SPOILER ALERT)))....signing of Divorce Papers and HER journey back to the place that led her to him in the first place. Um, don't remember seeing that little detail in the previews. Not to mention the unrealistic factor of waking from a coma, a guy that looks like Channing Tatum telling you he's your husband, and having a problem with that?!? I think in this case, casting worked against them.

BUT...and by "but" I mean "butt"....Channing Tatum's bare behind makes an appearance which bumped My Grade for The Vow: from a C to a solid B-

Stay tuned for a Review about 21 Jump Street, starring....(drum roll please)....Channing Tatum, due out March 16th. (See Trailer Here) This one definitely looks more like my cup of tea.

Thursday, February 16, 2012

Joyce Meyer Strikes Again

Yep. Her advice for "enjoying everyday life" bit me again. This time, it was in the form of a 2 part message on jumping to judgement. The lesson was to stop reacting to any situation right away, but instead take some time to seek how God wants you to react.

I thought I learned that lesson 2 weeks ago. We received a voice mail from the lunch lady at school informing us that we had "a situation" to discuss. Of course we assumed it was Z because if there's going to be "a situation" in the school cafeteria, he's not only going to be involved, but probably be the ringleader.

After talking to the lunch lady, I found out it didn't involve Z at all, but rather K. She'd already left for school and I sat fuming about her punishment and I couldn't believe I'd have to wait 7 hours to deal with her. I even text Z and instructed him to "tell her she's in big trouble when she gets home." He text back, "No. I don't know what she's done, but it serves no purpose to upset her at school."

I hate it when teenagers show more maturity than I do.

Over the course of the day, I calmed down and did some praying. Miraculously, by the time she stepped off the bus, I was in a state of mind to have a rational conversation with her and we together came up with an appropriate punishment that suited the offense, as opposed to my original idea which was to ground her until the lunch lady retired.

So as I listened to Joyce Meyer yesterday, I arrogantly nodded my head and agreed that being slow to react worked for me 2 weeks ago and I pompously pictured myself teaching those who hadn't yet learned what I'd already mastered.

A mere 5 hours later, a series of events happened and I totally blew it.

My downfall started when our daughter, A, who is just weeks away from turning 16, asked if she could turn our mini-van around in the driveway. What could go wrong? Three minutes after walking out the door, she returned sobbing and telling us she hit the brick post beside our house. I stopped and prayed so that I would react appropriately. I started yelling, threatened to use her youth group fundraising money to pay for the damage and then posted what she did on my Facebook without asking her permission.

Fifteen minutes later, while my husband and son worked on our demolished bumper, I turned around to see 3 of our barn cats involved in some sort of mating ritual. I stopped and prayed so that I would react appropriately. I ran stomping my feet wildly toward the cats loudly yelling about having a daughter who totals our van in the driveway and cats who desecrate our garage.
I bet our neighbors love us.

Three hours after that, I walked into the kitchen to witness one of my family members lick the peanut butter off of a knife and then dip the licked knife straight into the jelly jar. I stopped and prayed so that I would react appropriately. I flew off the handle and gave an over detailed account about germs and left the room with a dramatic sigh of disgust accompanied by my infamous eye roll.

When I said before that my downfall began with my daughter asking to turn the van around, I was wrong. My downfall began when I gave Satan a foothold with my arrogant attitude about having already mastered a lesson that I'd only begun to even try to work on. And my family paid the price when they had to put up with my explosive reactions.

I've since asked for my daughter's forgiveness. She was gracious enough to not only forgive me, but to allow me permission to share the story on my blog as an example of my mistake, not her's.

As for the cats, no apology necessary. And as far as I'm concerned, same goes for the person who defiled the family jelly jar. There are some behaviors that deserve some immediate stomping of feet and lessons in the growth of bacteria.

That leaves me with what to do about Joyce Meyer. Clearly, her lessons have the potential to stir up some trouble for me and in the grand scheme, my life is actually going smoothly right now and for the most part, I'm living in peace. But I'm a work in progress and I obviously have a long way to go, so I turned an episode on this morning. Her message began with how we need to bless people who treat us badly.

Oh, he** no. I'm not going there today.

*Click*

Thursday, February 9, 2012

iDumb

I don't understand technology. As a matter of fact, I don't understand the inner workings of much of anything.

A few weeks ago we changed over to a Geothermal Furnace. What does that mean? No idea. If you ask me, the only difference between our old furnace and our new furnace is that warm air blows out of our vents now. That's nice.

A few months ago we bought a new fancy washing machine. I'm completely baffled by it. I never hear water running. I never hear water draining. I never hear it spin. The only sound it makes is the occasional Click. I've tried popping in during the middle of a cycle. Click. One day I tried standing there through an entire cycle. Click. Click. Click. It was halfway through when I caught a glimpse of myself in the reflection of the washer lid and realized I looked like Jack Nicholson in "The Shining" right before he started throwing a ball against a wall and repeatedly typing "All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy." I forced myself to walk away.

So it should come as no surprise that I have zero comprehension of my iPhone. Don't get me wrong, I know how to use my iPhone. I love my iPhone. I feel naked without my iPhone. My iPhone makes me feel complete. It's become this strange little extension of my body that I don't understand, but think about a lot, and could never live without. (Insert inappropriate comparison to how men might feel about their man part....minus the need to scratch it....here)

That brings me to what happened here today. I was sitting in my recliner, wrapped in a quilt, enjoying my bowl of coffee while I watched Joyce Meyer. Today's lesson: Set your mind on Peace. Decide that nothing is going to upset you.

Sounds good. Got it. I set my mind on Peace and I decided that nothing was going to upset me, either. That felt great, for 10 whole minutes. Until I reached for my iPhone to make a phone call and literally gasped out loud when I couldn't find the picture of the little green phone. Key Pad, gone. List of contacts, gone. Ability to make calls, gone. Peace on my mind, gone.

My only connection to the outside world was the ability to text. I immediately texted a friend and asked for some ideas. She suggested restarting my phone. No luck. Then she suggested I seek the help of Siri.

I won't dwell on my strong feelings about Siri. The bottom line is, she's useless. I tried using her to send a text once. The phrase she was supposed to send was "put my mind at ease." The phrase that Siri actually sent was "Please find my diddies."

But in my desperation, I asked Siri for her help today. She referred me to 4 different Tai Food Restaurants in New York City. Siri is officially dead to me.

Two hours and one panic-induced hyperventilating attack later, my friend solved the problem and walked me through the steps of how to reset my Home Page.

Crisis over and soon after I was wrapping myself back up in my quilt, knowing exactly who was responsible for that entire fiasco.

I blame Joyce Meyer.